Vincent Van Den Broeck: The Man You Become Before Life Tests You

0:00 SPEAKER_02: So the person that found me, found me 11 meters further than the car, skull open, I'm suffocated, I'm I'm dying. On the spot, I'm dying. You have to know. So he asked the paramedics when they left the scene, is this guy gonna make it? They looked back and they were like, nah.

0:17 SPEAKER_00: What if the thing that saves you in your darkest moment is the person you became long before it happened? Vincent Vandenbroek has faced business failure, crushing debt, and an accident that left him fighting for his life. But this isn't just a story about survival. It's about identity, standards, and resilience. And the uncomfortable truth that when life finally tests us, we don't rise to the occasion, we fall back on who we've trained ourselves to be. Vincent, welcome to the turning point. Thank you so much for having me.

0:47 SPEAKER_02: By the way, that was probably the best intro I had until today. That was that one was good. Thank you so much. So, how's your summer been? My summer has been work, a lot of work. Honestly, I've been uh working in the restaurant still that we've been oh we own that place for right now more than seven years already. I work in a restaurant, been super busy with the with the book, especially the towards launch, which is gonna be uh the day of the accident this year, so October 11th. So I'm pretty busy doing back-to-back interviews, building, have another coaching uh project.

1:28 SPEAKER_02: So I've been working a lot. Been working a lot. But it's good, honestly, I can't complain. Yeah, it hasn't been uh it has been great. We've had a lovely summer, it was beautiful. Yeah, I don't know how to tell you like beautiful.

1:40 SPEAKER_00: Beautiful. It's been been really hot, been beautiful, yeah. Yeah, but with with work, I mean when it's your when it's your passion and something that you you completely get behind and it's your life, it doesn't feel like work. I mean it's it's hard because you're you're busy all the time in doing things, but it's there's a difference between kind of like my day job, which is working hard to make somebody else rich, doing something that you're doing, which is working hard to effectively help other people and and help other people improve their lives as well.

2:08 SPEAKER_00: Is it's very ri um very fulfilling.

2:11 SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and and again, uh you make me think about what actually is work. Because at the end of the day, what what it's it's a transaction, even if you're uh self-employed, it's what pays the bills, but indeed, uh what what is work? What is not working? Like for me, it's yeah, another cliche thing. Let's it's like the weekend and the week. Like the the week by definition is Monday to Friday, weekend is from Saturday to Sunday, and that is work too, like you're working, hence you're being paid for, uh, even when you're self-employed.

2:49 SPEAKER_02: So by definition, that is work, and then when you're not working is when you're doing exactly the opposite. And I've always been fascinated or at least obsessed by the fact that nobody actually sets the rules but yourself. Literally, I'm obsessed by it, and I know this sounds cliche and this sounds like arrogance, but who says rules but yourself? Yeah, agreed. So there is no wrong or right. I've literally uh had a uh a call with uh with someone this morning, and I told her uh the same thing, like I even forgot what day it was today.

3:24 SPEAKER_02: Because we were talking about working on the weekends, and I'm like, yeah, what day are we? And I told her, you see, I do not even know. Why? Because I'm not tied to this traditional definition of time. Like life is just it's it's life, and you move, you take one step at a time, and you move forward ideally. Sometimes you take a step back to make 10 to make 10 more. And it's this topic of uh you setting the rules, it I'm I'm really big on it, at least.

3:57 SPEAKER_00: No, I I like that because some people might say, Oh, well, I've got a boss, I've got this, whatever else, but but you you you can set the rules because if you're in in work that that's making you work too many hours and you're not happy, whatever else, you you have the the power to to do something else. Thank you. And and often people are are afraid to make that change. And I've I've worked with a few people who've who've worked somewhere for a long time, and then redundancy has come, and all of a sudden they're forced to make that change.

4:27 SPEAKER_00: And a few months later they're like, Why didn't I do that sooner? I'm so much happier somewhere else, I've got more freedom back, I've changed these aspects of my life.

4:35 SPEAKER_02: So, yes, sir. And that and the thing is, and it all it always goes back to us building ourselves a lifestyle that we actually cannot afford. So you're trapped in the situation you put yourself in. Because then we do a job that we just like uh like you just said, we do a job that we really hate, management doesn't appreciate us, the environment doesn't smell nice, colleagues do not like you, toxic environment to then for, by the way, a paycheck that again does not afford your lifestyle, to then complain to to your friends that are not actually your friends about that same job that you hate.

5:19 SPEAKER_02: And then we ask her, how come I'm tired all the time? How come I'm depressed? How come I'm burned out? And then we and then we tie it because that's the easy that's the easy way out. The the easy path is we tie it to working too much. No, that is not burnout. Burnout is you just work in a toxic environment for too long to then go back hoping for the weekend to come, to then hate your life back on Monday because you need to go back to it. See how how that's a vicious cycle. Like it doesn't, it there is no end to this.

5:53 SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so many people are trapped in it. But you you briefly mentioned your book and your book launched. Tell me a bit a bit about the book. Everything feels impossible until it's done.

6:02 SPEAKER_02: The my legacy to this world, this uh it uh talks about my literally the I have it here in front of literally the first sentence is I was 16 and life had been planned out. My mom had made sure of that first line, and that was literally my life. So it starts when I'm 16 until the day I got hit by a car, which was October 11, 2024. And then everything that came after, so the weeks of coma, the months of rehab, the whole recovery. Um, and it became almost means to an end. Like I did not ride this for therapy reasons, I did not write uh this to make money out of it.

6:42 SPEAKER_02: I always loved helping people around me. And I know, especially after believe people that already uh read it, that there is a lot of value in the book. So this is literally written for people to encourage themselves to ask the question, why na me instead of why me? Because we're especially in 2026, we live in a world where everybody's a victim.

7:07 SPEAKER_00: Yeah.

7:08 SPEAKER_02: It's always someone else's fault. It's society, then it's your kids, then it's your spouse, then it's your boss. One thing I'm big on is ownership. And the book is exact- I told my I told everybody around me like I'm gonna write a book, and it happened. So the book in itself is literally proof of everything that is in see how it's all connected, proof of everything that is written in the book. So uh and now it's uh it's it's there. Literally here in front of me. When is when is the launch? The launch, so pre- all pre-orders already got sent out as of September 15, and the official launch party is gonna be the day of the accident this year, October 11, to make the whole thing full circle.

7:54 SPEAKER_02: Why? Because recovery, when I was still in the hospital, was supposed to take two years. But guess what? That didn't happen. Now I'm doing this launch.

8:04 SPEAKER_00: That's incredible. So I I did a podcast with a uh a guy um probably six, nine months ago now. Um, and he was in hospital, he had um issues with his spine, went to hospital, was told he would take him a year to start walking again, and he said, no, fuck that. I'm gonna do an Iron Man, and I'm gonna do an Iron Man in four months' time. And and it's kind of the book is he said, if I didn't sign up to do that, he said it might have taken me two years to to recover. And then he wrote that book to kind of talk about his journey as well.

8:33 SPEAKER_00: So it's it's fascinating. But but but before we get into talking about your your accident, I want to know of who were you when when nobody was watching?

8:40 SPEAKER_02: That's always a tough question to answer, but to make it very simple, uh I was just someone that loved life. I was a winner, regardless of everything that I did until today. That that that's Vincent. He's just a winner. He's uh in my eyes, he's a high-performing athlete that is obsessed by winning, that lost a lot, but I always loved the game.

9:15 SPEAKER_00: That's a good answer. I love that.

9:17 SPEAKER_02: That was good. Well, I'm gonna keep that one. That's the first time I say it like this, but uh it's it's it's true. I've always been I've always genuinely loved life. And everything about it, the obstacles, the the challenges, the failures, the espresso in the morning, the conversations, the everything about it.

9:39 SPEAKER_00: That that was one of the things that interested me about getting you on on the podcast, because so many people that you speak to, me included, had to have that kind of that that downfall, that rock bottom to then come back and think actually, uh yeah, actually, I am amazing. Life is amazing. I'm grateful for every single day. Whereas you had that before, I think that that that's quite incredible. And and potentially that that was what what got you through your your accident and recovery so quick.

10:06 SPEAKER_02: Not not even potentially that got me to that is exactly and and this this is not arrogance, this is not pretending. It is exactly that. I will never make a big deal. You know what? Okay, I'm not gonna lie, it was tough, but again, it was the probably the most difficult period of my, and I'm gonna say entire, but I'm only 34, my entire life, but here it gets interesting, but not the worst. Can you imagine being able to tell yourself that? Not the worst. There's beauty and hardship, and then it was.

10:41 SPEAKER_02: And you know what? It's more sellable if you say like, yo, I had this big epiphany and this and this and this happened, and now I'm this and this and this. Sorry to break it to you, but not at all, unfortunately.

10:53 SPEAKER_00: Yeah. You touched upon it just sort of earlier on about finding yourself quite badly in debt. Some for the research I've done on you to the tune of it was 800,000 euros. Um you saw that one. Yeah, indeed. I I I like to do my research on people. A lot of people would have thrown in the towel and just given up at that point. But how did you bounce back from that? Brother, there's always a solution.

11:18 SPEAKER_02: And even if there's there isn't, there is. And when you do the the word we're talking about is resilience. And we s we throw it around nowadays all the time. Which, by the way, for me is the most important skill to have as a human being for anyone. And resilience is a muscle that you can train like any other in your body. And the way I see it, how to train that muscle is when you're going through something difficult, instead of avoiding it, you face it.

11:52 SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna make it even better. For people, and I consider my again, if I have to believe people around me, I'm resilient in the flesh, and there's enough proof, I'm gonna make it even better. Being more resilient doesn't make life easier.

12:18 SPEAKER_02: Just give give it less time. The first time it might take, let's, let's, the same situation you go through. The first time it might take you 30 days to get over it, and then it takes you three days, and then it takes you three hours, 30 minutes, 30 seconds.

12:32 SPEAKER_00: Yeah. Have you have you heard about the bison? The animals, the bison. So they when there's a storm coming, they will run into the storm and they will go through the storm. Whereas other animals will run, they'll hide, and and the bison are in the eye of the storm for a short period of time. It's painful and it's it's difficult, but they're then through the storm and quicker than the other animals that they're through it and they're moving on. Whereas the other animals who are trying to shelter and trying to avoid it, they're in that bad weather for a lot longer.

13:03 SPEAKER_02: Wow. Didn't I know that? You're teaching me a lot of things today.

13:07 SPEAKER_00: That's that that's the analogy that I like to use with with with resilience and and pushing forward. You you have an obstacle or a challenge in your life, you can ignore it, you can avoid it, or you can just there's only one way to go, but through it, and you push your way through. Step by step. Yeah. Um, so I want to uh touch on something now which is obviously very, very key to you, which is the the morning of the 11th of October 2024, um, before everything changed. So, what do you remember about the the last ordinary hours of of your life before the accident happened?

13:38 SPEAKER_02: The morning in itself, I had breakfast with my wife, which was kind of special. Again, weird to say that, but kind of special because we were on survival mode. Like I've I was working a lot, and that's another long story. And she was then abroad for work, and she just came back, I think a couple of days before we had breakfast for the second time that week, which again felt special. And in the evening, we had a catering event with the with the business. So I asked her, like, could you join me to spend just to spend even if it was work to spend again going back, see how everything is connected?

14:14 SPEAKER_02: Going back to you're the only one setting the rules. It was just to spend some more time, even if it's if it was work, at least we were together. And that was through a legal procedure restructuring death from the business that we've been dragging along since uh along sorry since COVID. And I there was one last file that I had to send over that evening to our lawyers, and I've always been doing admin, and I still do admin from the Hoxton, which is a hotel here in the city center of Brussels. So I left earlier from the catering event to the hotel, and it is in front of the hotel that I got hit by a car.

14:50 SPEAKER_02: And by the way, I I know that I was on my way, but from there, no more memories. I follow nothing, nothing. And I know that I was on my way, but and again, a car hit me with a braking speed. So the moment he hit me, it was 55 kilometers an hour in a 30 zone, meaning he was probably driving at like 90 or 100. And even thinking about it after me waking up, like I've always had good reflexes, like someone would fall from the table, I'm able to grab it. So I was I was literally wondering like, how would there be a car driving towards me?

15:29 SPEAKER_02: And I do not move. Like I stay still. So it happened so, so fast. Boom, fall on the front window. And again, all this I know because stories fall on the front window, roof, wasn't wearing. I was on an e-scooter, by the way. Wasn't wearing any helmet, and then it got really disgusting. So the person that found me, found me 11 meters further than the car, skull open, I'm suffocating, I'm I'm gasping, I'm dying. On the spot, I'm dying. You have to know. So he asked the paramedics when they left the scene, is this guy gonna make it?

16:02 SPEAKER_02: They looked back and they were like, nah. And then uh the next three weeks uh I would spend uh in a coma.

16:12 SPEAKER_00: Wow. So so the paramedics were on the scene, took you to the hospital, uh and you were you were in a in a it was in like an induced coma for three weeks, was it?

16:22 SPEAKER_02: No, it was uh a real coma. They put me in a they put me though in a deeper coma. Until uh until I think they stopped giving the the meds uh after one week or two weeks, I don't know. But they put me anyways in a deeper coma, and you have to know so it was so first surgeries the day after another and another third and fourth one, I caught 40 degree fever while I was still in coma, so they had to put me on ice blankets. And by the way, I got super lucky, and even I forget to talk about it a lot. My cervicals got fractured, so I was this close to being paralyzed for the rest of my life.

17:01 SPEAKER_02: Yep. Which uh luckily didn't happen, and then suddenly had to come in the room a couple of times to literally drill in my skull to drain some more blood. So it was disgusting. It was literally bad news on bad news until the day I woke up. It was the narrative was to my wife stop preparing the funeral because your husband is probably not gonna make it. And we remember we were 32. Can you imagine? That is also why I would I would always tell people, like, I didn't went to the I didn't go through the worst.

17:35 SPEAKER_02: I was just sleeping for three weeks. But for for her, for for my family, for everybody around me, just hearing that, I can't I can only imagine how painful that would have been.

17:50 SPEAKER_00: Yeah, for three weeks as well, when when someone you you love is in a situation like that, for three weeks, the kind of the ups and downs, it but must have been horrendous. I mean, how did that affect you when you kind of discovered what what your wife and family had been living through while you were unconscious?

18:06 SPEAKER_02: I cried.

18:13 SPEAKER_02: And the two main reasons why why I would cry literally this morning. And my wife is in Amsterdam, and I had her on the phone this uh this morning, and I cried on the phone literally because he told me, take some time for yourself because the past weeks I've been super busy, go out for uh for a coffee, and I and and I told her, like, yeah, no, I can't I cannot do this, I need to do this and this and this. And she's yeah, please do that for me. And I literally told her like I put you already once in this situation, not a second time.

18:46 SPEAKER_02: I will take I will take the time needed when your future is taken care of. And I literally started crying. Even telling it to you right now makes me emotional because and the second reason I will cry is when I think about how proud I am about me. Back then, I took the worst period of my the worst time of my life with as much grace as one could do. Literally, I'm t I tell I tell myself, Vincent, you can be fucking proud of yourself. You did it.

19:26 SPEAKER_00: Absolutely. Oh yeah, yeah. I mean, there's a lot a lot of people, it's uh wouldn't have come through that in in the way you you have it. I mean to look to to look at you and talk to you now, everything, it's it's quite difficult to think that all this happened to you two years ago. It's quite quite remarkable. It's almost like you're talking about someone else. It's it is remarkable.

19:46 SPEAKER_02: And you know what? Exactly that.

19:49 SPEAKER_00: What was it what was it like waking up after a coma from three weeks?

19:53 SPEAKER_02: Unfortunately, it wasn't like in the again, it wasn't like in the movies, like and then and then you're awake and aware of your surroundings. It was the coma in itself only took three weeks, but I would tell people five weeks because those first two weeks, I was in a bad place. Honestly, I would hallucinate it a lot. Basic stuff I wasn't able to do. Walking, not possible. Talking, mm-mm. There's a scar still over here, so they put a tracheotomy, trache, yeah, tracheal tracheotomy, yeah, yeah. Tracheotomy, sorry.

20:24 SPEAKER_02: So I was able to speak, but there was no sound coming out because the vocal codes were too damaged. Then I was wearing a cask with which frustrated me so much. Um, I could not eat. They would give me fluid, so it was all just too much. And I'm someone that never complains, never complain, and just never complains in general. I'm high energy all the time. Then I was complaining, everything was too much. Sitting up straight in my hospital bed was not possible. It felt like running a marathon, and I did not have any notion of time.

20:59 SPEAKER_02: So for me, 10 hours would feel like 10 minutes, or 10 minutes would feel like 10 hours. So it was this weird space to be in. And again, you're you're in the hospital bed, and then slowly but steadily you start recovering, and then you take your very first step, which again felt like running a marathon, and then you take two, and then you take four, and then you take five, and then all of a sudden you can drink by yourself. There's there's even this video on Instagram that I posted a while ago where I'm able to open a water bottle for the first time by myself, and I'm literally on the video like celebrate it.

21:40 SPEAKER_02: So it became the small things, and then it became on I walked into rehab on November twenty. And then it was and then it was delivery time. Then playing time was over. So uh it was brother, it was a la. It was a laugh.

21:58 SPEAKER_00: I can't I can't imagine. what you were going through. I mean when I when I had my neurosurgery, it was during COVID. So I was only in hospital a very short period of time. So they sent me home very, very, uh, very quick. And then I I had some horrendous hallucinations for like two days. And like every time my heart beat, it felt like every blood vessel in my head was going to explode and and I'd had like a week in bed and then I I'd been quite fit and I used to go to the gym. And then to be in a situation where whereby I was like struggling to walk upstairs.

22:30 SPEAKER_00: And then for me it was like right, I'm going to walk around the house. Right. I'm going to walk around the block, right? I'm going to walk one kilometer. And I set myself a target every day of doing doing a little little bit more. Because I was on this um Facebook forum for people who had the same procedure as me. And some of them are saying that they you know two years later they still couldn't run and no energy and stuff. I said, fuck, that's not going to be me. I'm going to break the rules here.

22:56 SPEAKER_00: So thank you. And and it sounds like you was you were similar because you um again with with my research on you you you arrived at rehabilitation and you decided that you were going to walk out by yourself by your birthday.

23:09 SPEAKER_02: So who did you have to believe that you were before there was actually evidence that you could do that everything and it's it's never a one shoot it's all kind of answer or solution it's it's perspective it's ownership. It's you know what just being someone nice it's so you're able to ask for favors when you need them. They they became my best literally doctors are still coming over to my place until today it's being humble it's loving life it's pushing your limits it's building your own reality it's it's it's a lot of things it was discipline it was again big change never happens in big moments big change always happens in small daily decisions daily and again less sellable more boring but guess what it's in that grind that real change maybe not tomorrow maybe not next week nor next month but one day when you give enough you'll get it sounds like you've been on one of my courses because you when I I I get people come and they they want to change they want to get fit they want to lose weight they want to run a marathon it doesn't matter and and and it's that people talk about motivation it's nothing to do with motivation.

24:37 SPEAKER_00: No it's the it's the discipline and the discipline to do the small things every single day day after day when nobody's watching you know getting up to train at 5 30 in the morning eating the healthy food you know you don't suddenly have one vitamin tablet and all of a sudden you feel great but every day for 10 years and and you do. And and I I also love what you said about just being a nice person because so many people enter these situations as like oh I'm a fucking victim and they're snapping at nurses and doctors and things.

25:07 SPEAKER_00: When you're in in a healthcare situation just be nice to people respect the fact that they could be dealing with 10 other patients and if you and this is the same in life I used to you know I used to go to nightclubs and I'd always get served first at the bar. Why? Because when I go in early and a place is empty get talking to someone buy them a drink thank them for working in the evening and when they see it with a bar hey I'll serve you it's how are you getting the served so quick it's because I'm not being a fucking asshole that's why thank you thank you so much being nice is literally everything hence by the way the book I always told people and I still tell people that it's pretty easy but again pretty selfish to think that when you're going through something difficult it's all about you.

25:54 SPEAKER_02: You're dragging a lot of people with you hence the doctors and nurses. And so I made it a big deal also to make them part of my recovery because most of the times you're better and it's like bye hope to never see you again thank you and then and then you're off and I was like okay that's not being grateful. Gratefulness another big another big one when you're just grateful for for even the base the basic basic stuff literally the sunning shining you you know how I was feeling today I was like wow amazing you're just someone grateful and you see it's just always a lot of things and that by the way and I love what you just said that because that is always um that is the reason why I compare life to sport because in the in that world like for us it's normal that someone has been playing football for 15 years and then plays at the a game at the World Cup.

26:55 SPEAKER_02: The what else in life for us apparently different rules there are different rules the same rules don't count and it's always that literally marathon you don't you do not run a marathon tomorrow if you never ran. And the bo and it is indeed it's cool when there's 4000 people cheering and screaming and yelling at you and you post and you post on Instagram and you get some likes that that is cool. But indeed running at 530 in the morning because that was part of the plan pretty boring. And it's dark outside and it's cold and nobody's cheering but it's always in the boring stuff that you will make the difference and that is that is a definition that we have a tough time to accept like there's there's there's a lot of there's a lot of stuff that we just accept like the sun comes up in the morning goes down in the evening weekends again going back to weekends weekends are Saturday and Sunday weeks are Monday to Friday there's four seasons in a year 24 hours in a day all that is easy but we have a tough time accepting the fact that hard work always pays off results always follow.

28:13 SPEAKER_02: Biffless is made in the boring stuff.

28:16 SPEAKER_00: It is yeah and that is why we never start you see there there's a lot of people on on social media these manifestors and uh they'll be on TikTok or Instagram oh look at me all I did was I stay in a coffee shop and I I write in my journal every day and I manifest this amazing life. I I've got a a Lamborghini and I've got an amazing apartment. And then people read that shit or watch that shit and think all they've got to do is like write down I am rich I have a million pounds in my bank account it's not going to work you you've got to actually put the work in behind it.

28:49 SPEAKER_00: It's this is one of the things that I teach to my or coach with my men on as well is it's the identity. You've got to change your identity. You know so many people let's take the marathon for example so the London marathon it's it's it's a shocking number like 40 or 50% of first time marathon runners never run again. Why? Because they're unfit they say I'm going to run the London marathon they get a place they train they eat healthy for a little bit they do the marathon and then they think right I'm not going to run again for a week because my legs hurt and then they start eating takeaway and then they start drinking and then they're back to the old self because they've not changed their identity that they're still the person that they were when they started the journey.

29:29 SPEAKER_00: Always always speaking of marathons I've got a marathon coming up in a week on Sunday which I'm looking forward to good luck with that. Thank you Jersey marathon not New Jersey Jersey in the Channel Islands Jersey that even exists Yeah yeah we we have loads of sport here. We've we've got a round the island ultra marathon we've got a um a swim run which is round the island swimming and running we have triathlons over here rowing races loads of sport over here that's amazing that's amazing good luck with that luck with that so just talking about success now would you say that your definition of of being a successful person has changed since your accident no not at all still the same but I put words on it before it was obvious the logic thing but I put words on it and for me success means you being able to answer yes in as many days as you can to these three questions pretty easy by the way one am I truly happy two did I do everything I wanted to do and had to do today three was I better today than I was yesterday if you are able to and yeah I think so or I guess as an alternative I mean an unapologetic yes yes I'm damn happy yes I did everything I had to do and wanted to do and yes I was better than I was yesterday listen carefully there's 365 days in a year do that let's I'm gonna be nice here 50% we're talking about 180 days and you can tell yourself yes to those three questions do that and here it gets interesting do that times two three five ten fifteen yeah let's see where you will be yeah that's it that's incredible that's success yeah and successful life so many people chase a goal as a measure of success so a promotion at work a qualification getting married running a marathon for example but um so one of I've done the London marathon a couple of times and and one of the inscriptions on the back of my medal kind of sums up what you just said there that success is a journey not a destination thank you um I mean just doing something going yes I've done it now you get a bit of a dopamine hit when you finish it or when you achieve the goal and then if your identity hasn't shifted you you go back to your old ways you have to continually be improving yourself continually be enhancing your standards and and and improving otherwise that that's not successful.

32:25 SPEAKER_00: A lot of people put success on how much money they earn but are they truly happy I mean I work with people who earn a lot of money who are not happy and are miserable and are quite depressed.

32:36 SPEAKER_02: So it's cool it's cool to have a lot of money but it always it always goes back to the basics it is indeed about the journey and again I'm gonna make it even better you do not need to win every game to win the season. Yeah that's a good point you don't do you and and and and again in sports for us you're the normal but in life we get so obsessed with losing with failure like what are we doing?

33:06 SPEAKER_00: It's part of the game and you know what you lose more than you'll win there's a there's a lot of statistics out there of Roger Federer I think winning 50% of the grand slams he played like yeah losing is part of the game yeah definitely agreed if if you could um if you could sit opposite someone now someone in their 30s or 40s who who keeps telling themselves that they'll they'll change I'll change when life calms down I'll I'll change when when life gets a bit easier what would you want them to understand before life actually makes that decision for them sorry to break it I'm I'm I'm black and white when I talk to people I'll tell that person sorry to break it to you but life is not easy and it will never be you better accept it right now and then it comes yeah but yeah but yeah the yeah but people are the worst in the world the moment you delete those two words from your vocabulary life gets better until then good luck but I can guarantee you right now that one day you will and you will wake up with so much regret you're now ready for it.

34:17 SPEAKER_02: And there's one thing you want to avoid in life that's regret.

34:20 SPEAKER_00: Yeah absolutely and it's the yeah but people and and as you say life is net never perfect so we are uh in my coaching group there's a few of us doing a 30 day no sugar challenge um and then I'm I'm uh at work two days ago and someone saw me in the kitchen and said oh you're still doing your sugar challenge I said yeah yeah and um this person said I'd love to do that but I just don't know when to start because next month I've got my birthday and then the month after I've got this and then it's Christmas and the and then she was like maybe I'll start in January I was like come on like you know if you want to do it start today stop making excuses birthday Christmas there'll always be an excuse not to do something.

34:59 SPEAKER_02: The feeling ready again feeling hence by the way the title of the book the most the two most important words of the title are feels and done feels is always connected tied to a result which by the way you will never be able to control it doesn't mean nothing it's not actually going back to feeling ready you will never feel ready by the way and then there's done tie tied to the doing part which you will always be able to control you can make the you can start your first day without sugar today I'm fascinated by it and then all of a sudden you had your 30 days it's again we're not talking about a skill or or a talent this is not something you were born with this is just a decision of you making the next step of doing your next day without sugar and I can again I can guarantee you because this is a simple example and I love using simple examples it will be tough the sugar sugar all around oh yeah I know there will be a lot of moments and then you're in front of Netflix and you want to eat some uh crisps or then you're in a bar and you want to drink a beer because it's good weather temptation is all around going back to aha you want to become more resilient say no it's gonna be tough and by the way the 10th time you will say no it's still gonna be tough and the 20th time it's still gonna be tough but then you hating your life for 10 hours all of a sudden becomes only hating it for 10 seconds.

36:48 SPEAKER_02: You want to drink a beer? No and you move on.

36:50 SPEAKER_00: Yeah that that's the same with me now I gave up drinking two years ago and it's because it was just didn't fit in with the person who I was becoming sugar I'm finding slightly harder. 80 20 80 20 brother yeah all right Vincent I've already enjoyed that I think that's been an awesome uh conversation thank you very much for coming on same thank you again thank you for having me